I asked the Universe

for more support

to be full of thought

Like the game of chess

a move ahead

A game I never learned

The first test came quickly

Next day actually

I failed

I failed big time

You know, those big mistakes

One you can’t really fix

That solo opportunity

Once in a lifetime

No take-backsies

I knew it was her last

New home was calling

Thought weeks ago

I would be there for her

Attend her church

The one she loved

To be by her side

Her last time there

But less important things

became

seemingly more important

that day

Derailed the promise

Remembered way

too late

Embarrassed, ashamed

and disappointed

in myself

In the broken promises

I was tested to keep

The test the Universe

gave me

The one for which I asked

I saw her days later

I told her the mistake

She smiled, hugged me

Trying to unburden me

But I felt it deep

Was filled with so

much regret

She didn’t forgive

It wasn’t her role

That was reserved

for me to myself

She held space

as I sobbed in her arms

I’m sorry wasn’t taught

something never heard

or learned growing up

Hard to say, hard to teach

Hard to practice

those two little words

But I like to learn, right?

Even in the discomfort

So I said them to her

I’m sorry my friend

and I’m sorry Universe

I vow to do better

Those once in a lifetimes

A bedside, a move,

a moment in time

Any transition in life

Keep an eye out

It can slip by

Forever gone

Forever regretted

I will receive

many chances I’m sure

to practice full of thought-ness

and I’m sorrys, I know

Opportunities abound

grateful for another day

To practice the work

For which I asked