I believe in soul mates. I must be a romantic at heart or just really into this spiritual thing. I witnessed two beautiful weddings recently. Both couples had known each other for over 10 years. They were high school sweethearts. Soul mates? I’ve got to believe it. One couple even married on my anniversary, so yes I do believe! While it is nice to have faith in the idea of having a soul mate, the book Anam Cara, A Book of Celtic Wisdom, by John O’Donohue (not sure you could be MORE Irish) has given me pause to reflect on what soul mate really means.

Anam Cara (pronounced uh•nam keh•ruh) from the early Celtic church translates to “soul friend.” Mr. O’Donohue goes on to explain “With the anam cara, you could share your innermost self, your mind, and your heart. This friendship was an act of recognition and belonging. When you had an anam cara, your friendship cut across all convention, morality and category. You were joined in an ancient and eternal way with the ‘friend of your soul.’ The Celtic understanding did not set limitations of space or time on your soul. There is no cage for the soul. It is divine light that flows into you and into your Other.”

This definition opened my heart and mind to the possibilities of not just that one single soul mate, but the soul friendships I haven’t fully explored as soul-full, that of my sister, my long time friend from high school, my Australian friend I haven’t seen in years but know if I did tomorrow we would pick up right were we left off, the yoga instructor who moved away to start the life of her dreams, the sprinkling of very good friends I have in my tiny town, the clients with whom I can have deep meaningful conversations, not to mention my grown-up children and my not-so-grown-up one at home. When you shine the light, the divine light on these relationships, they shift, making even the quickest check-in more meaningful, like our short drive to school, when it is just the two of us or that kiss blowing emoji on the text line in a chat with my children or friend. You are sharing love. You are receiving love. These are soulful connections. These relationships are soul friendships. They are special because they don’t just happen with anyone. Why is that? Why are only certain connections on the anam cara level? A question maybe meant to remain a mystery.

In the meantime, I will focus on the ones I have now. This blessing from Mr. O’Donohue’s book helps us strengthen all of our soul friendships:

A Friendship Blessing

May you be blessed with good friends.

May you learn to be a good friend yourself.

May you be able to journey to that place in your soul where there is great love, warmth, feeling and forgiveness.

May this change you.

May it transfigure that which is negative, distant, or cold in you.

May you be brought in to the real passion, kinship and affinity of belonging.

May you treasure your friends.

May you be good to them and may you be there for them; may they bring you all the blessings, challenges, truth and light that you need on your journey.

May you never be isolated.

May you always be in the gentle nest of belonging with your anam cara.

That wedding I attended (on my anniversary) found me away from my anam cara (we couldn’t both go) but it didn’t stop me from reaching out to him and letting him know he is my soul friend. I’m sure you have experienced this with your soul mate, your soul friend, if you believe in such things, which I hope you do. And now with Mr. O’Donohue’s guidance, we can strengthen all of our soul-full relationships, in deeply meaningful ways.