It started 11 years ago

when I no longer

walked him

into 

school

He would jump out 

of the car and 

say Mama

Remember

extra kiss

Just before he entered

The building

He would look 

Throwing a 

Kiss

I can’t recall if at first

his hand met his mouth

but I won’t

forget those

lips

Now, sixteen, he 

still looks back

and discretely 

puckers

them up

The family secret

until now

because I awoke

with tears in 

my eyes

Knowing this too shall

pass knowing these

blown kisses

will

end

A reason not to give him a 

car I say

despite how much

easier it would be 

for me

Ready or not

We don’t ever want

To think this

Is our last

fill in the blank

But it makes you feel

more appreciative

of the ones

that 

remain

Knowing the kisses will

end makes

the ones now

so much more

special

There have been hundreds

of them maybe 

a thousand plus

Each one with a 

smile

Each one special

no more no less

than the last

until there is the

Last

And then that one will 

Be the most special

And the saddest

As another chapter

Closes

And all that is 

Left are the

Memories

Of those

Puckered lips

As I am handed one more

treat for Christmas from my

Love and the youngest

is handed one

too.

He reveals a key

a key to my car,

now

his

car

Which can only mean one thing

A key to my new car

in the small box in

my

hands

The key to my independence

freedom, the

key to the fateful

last

kiss

Bittersweet does not

describe the emotion

The thrill of my little

black

mini

But in the back of my mind

I realize those extra

kisses will be further

and further apart

until

they are gone

and the tears start but then

I realize these extra kisses

have morphed from

a daily thing

to a forever thing

Dropping him off at college

or at the airport

really any time he

gets out of the car

Those extra kisses

will keep coming

a forced tradition my new habit

from my lips towards

him

for which I am shameless

because I will do

whatever it takes

to keep the extra

kiss

from becoming the last