Ah, the Victim. We all know one, we may even be one! According to Positive Intelligence™, we do have nine saboteurs, not all at once but throughout our lives. I’m not fully buying that idea, but I certainly buy into having at least one Saboteur (not including our Judge - which we all have).

I’m sure you can all recognize the Victims in your life, whether it is your go-to Saboteur, or a close friend or family member. The characteristics include being withdrawn and pouty, fairly dramatic and temperamental, when things get tough, they give up and they seek attention through having emotional pain.

The Victim’s thoughts include “No one understands me,” “I am uniquely flawed,” and “Poor me, terrible things happen to me all the time.” Victims feel alone, and melancholy and usually have negative comparisons and envy.

They justify their Victim behavior by telling the lies that this is the way they will get attention and that sadness is noble. Their childhood message included not feeling seen or accepted, that something especially was wrong with them.

But the Victim Saboteur has the positive sides of the Type 4 on the Enneagram. Their strengths include being sensitive, introspective, very perceptive of the nuanced inner workings of the mind, and very capable of using this strength to connect, teach, inspire, and heal others.

Like all Saboteurs, this is just the beginning of self-actualization. If the Victim is your go-to strategy when things are going South, then you may be an Enneagram Type 4. Self-reflection is the beginning of typing yourself on the Enneagram.

Not sure if you can do it alone? Book a free session and I will give you access to two assessments to help us figure out your type. Together we can nail down your type and then the fun begins!

I’VE BEEN TYPED NOW WHAT?

I get this question after most every Enneagram typing session. Sure, I follow up with an email with some general information but the real work is in learning more about who you are, your strengths, shadow, childhood message, Triad, Arrows, Wings and more. Where does an Enneagram type begin?

Well, the least expensive way is a DIY. Read what you can get your hands on, and listen to books, or podcasts. But the truth of the matter is, you need feedback. So many times in my typing sessions, listening to the client, I am able to reflect back to them something they did not realize they said. Or another group participant says something slightly differently and it deeply resonates with the client.

Beginning Thursday night, 10/26 at 7:00 pm, I will be offering a twice monthly Enneagram Group Coaching session where we will start tackling the nuances of the Enneagram beginning with the Triads, starting with The Centers of Intelligence: Head, Heart and Body. The Centers of Intelligence help identify our most accessible emotional response or reaction; for those with a Head Center, anxiety and distress, for those with the Heart Center, fear and shame, and for those coming from the Body Center, frustration or anger. We will dive into exactly what this all means for YOU that night. This is the beginning of learning more about yourself and a perfect opportunity to take your personal growth journey one step further. $35. Sign up today. Limited to 8 people.