Arrogantly, a few years ago, I boldly claimed I didn’t have any shadows. Either I was delusional, ill-informed or simply full of myself. Could be a combination of all three. Come to find out, we all have a minimum of three Shadows.
I was shocked to learn this recently in my Year of Conscious Living class but once it was explained, I quickly fell in line (and agreed). Yes, I hoard my resources. Check (Shadow #1). I can also get Restless (low side of my Seven arrow). Check (Shadow #2). But this last one, I had to discover while in the moment, the low side of my Eight arrow (bossiness). Check (Shadow #3).
Never had I considered myself bossy, but this wouldn’t be something I show to just anyone. Apparently, you only show this particular shadow-y side in your most secure relationships. Bossy Pants showed up on a car ride recently when I was feeling, let’s call it, triggered.
My husband likes to bring up big topics on the way home from our Burlington trips. I can almost guarantee when it is going to happen. Maybe he is tired or hungry or just deep in thought but about 20 minutes outside of Stowe, he will drop a bomb. This time it was regarding future plans and how we would probably be in Stowe longer than I might want to be.
Triggered.
I hate winters and I’m building my coaching practice so we can move. Not tomorrow, but let’s say five years out. With my dreams being pulled out from under me, I stated something along the lines, “Well, I guess I will be moving and you can visit me.” Whoa. That language NEVER comes out of my mouth. I have worked to be pretty go-with-the-flow (not my nature, just growth work). So when you start talking about having to live in long winters for longer than I care to think about, I get triggered.
What triggers you when you are with your loved ones? What is your reaction? If you need a little help discovering this third shadow, the most elusive one, email me and I can help you. Or you can look at the low side of your Growth Arrow. It will be there in all its glory. I promise. And then, the real work begins - observing, reflecting, and development (presence - the key to transformation). Have fun dealing with the suck.
Be on the lookout this Fall for Group coaching sessions by Type. We will mostly likely meet twice a month as a group. Sign ups will be in August. Stay tuned. And if you haven’t been typed…. remember I offer typing sessions for free. You’ll love it!
This week’s blog is all about Virtues. We are getting closer and closer to our True Selves! YAY you!
