Give yourself some grace!

When I was a little girl, I went roller skating with my sister and her friends. She is 10 years older than me and always allowed me to tag along. It was always so much fun and hanging out with real adults was my comfort zone. I remember one time in particular, we stopped to eat some lunch. Someone (who will remain nameless) reached across the table and stole one of my fries right off my plate. I lost it. I actually started crying. Everyone teased me and to this day, they still do but what my little Five-self didn’t know (and clearly no one else did) was that resources were important to me and sharing isn’t my strong suit. Now, had they asked if they could have a fry, I would have (begrudgingly) offered one up (just ask Ernie if I like to share my dinners) but I most likely wouldn’t have lost it.

The why behind this Shadow and behind everyone’s Shadow lies in the Enneagram. When I first learned about my Shadow, it was as if someone turned the lights on. I had the why behind my behavior and when the Shadow becomes conscious, it is truly transformative. Of course, we can’t excuse this behavior as “that’s just me” but we can understand ourselves a little better and through this understanding, give ourselves some grace.

Remember, I am still offering FREE Enneagram typing sessions. If you’ve done it for yourself then now it is time to offer it to someone you love. Your relationship will forever be changed, for the better. And FYI, I LOVE doing these. I feel on purpose. You are not taking advantage of me. I WANT to do them - so please take me up on this offer.

While I know my latest blogs don’t quite have the flavor of former blogs, I am trying to set up a reference system for those who are just beginning to explore the Enneagram. Without this baseline of knowledge, we really can’t get into the specifics of each type. You can read this week’s blog here where I dive into instincts and Subtypes.

You are more than your number.

I remember when someone told me about the Enneagram. She said, “You will love it.” I thought to myself, “I’m more than a number.” I laugh at myself now, knowing which Type I am (5 wing 4 - 4s feel special and unique) and I am so grateful the Universe conspired and now I am an Enneagram Coach. Richard Rohr writes in A Spring Within Us, “The only people who reject the Enneagram in my experience are people who do not understand it or do not have the humility or readiness to recognize how true it is in their own case.” Ha! That was totally me. This is also why you use the term dominant type when typing - we are more than just one number but that one number is an important starting point.

In my Deep Dive workshop, this week we tackled Saboteurs (I will be blogging about those in a couple of weeks). This happens to be one of the icky parts of the Enneagram and takes you a step deeper, adding nuance to the “more than a number” mentality. It is humbling to admit those neural addictions we have come up with to cope in life - our Saboteurs. I shared a moment when my Type Six sister (who tends to worry about most things) shared with me via text that she was worried about a family member. I said (in my Hyper-Rational Type Five way), “He is an adult.” That was all I wrote. Not very EQ of me (which I can access with my wing of Type Four). I now realize I could have validated how she felt (now knowing she is a Six and tends to worry) and still mentioned that he is an adult. Adding more EQ into the situation would have been a win-win. This is part of my life’s work. It brings to mind when a client said to me, “You aren’t that warm and fuzzy.” I remember how shocked I was at that observation. I can now see what she was talking about. Working on it - daily.

You can see how knowing your dominant Type and those of others is mutually beneficial. It helps tremendously with conflict resolution (and personal growth - I know, I know, broken record). But it really does. And between you and me, I would have never admitted to my sister that Hyper-Rational was showing up had I not understood my motivations to behave that way and her motivations to worry. Personal Growth! Familial Growth! (even better). By the way, it is very special doing a workshop with my sister. Just sayin’.

Remember I offer FREE Enneagram typing - no strings attached, I promise.

Typed and Retyped: Now it is your turn

Twice this week, once in a follow-up session and once in a workshop, a typed client needed a revisit with their typing. You see, some types look similar, especially when people have “done the work.” This usually has to do with the Nine Type.

Nines are easy-going, non-confrontational, Buddha-like. In one case a Type Two was confused with a Type Nine. These two types share other types through wings and arrows - complicating the situation. The Type Nine has a Wing 8 and Type 2 has an Arrow 8. Type Nine has a Wing 1 and Type 2 has a Wing 1. And, Type Nine has an Arrow 3, and Type 2 has a Wing 3. Sharing three of their four wings and arrows confuses things. They can appear very similar in personality. (See graphics of Nine and Two and their arrows. Wings flank the Types.)

So, if you’ve done the work, you may look and test like a Nine. It isn’t until a slightly deeper dive reveals the mistype. And then the real work can begin. If you are feeling you’ve been mistyped (either with me or a DIY option online, and especially if you have been typed as a Nine), please reach out to me and schedule a FREE appointment. You CANNOT do the real work of self-observation, self-reflection, or self-development until you have been typed correctly. Because only then, do things make sense and you can see your Type-ness in everything you do. Then you can pivot and grow. Yay for you and everyone around you. And for me, because I LOVE when people are able to learn about themselves.

Also, wanted to share that I am officially an Enneagram University Certified Coach. Pretty fun to be certified since it gives me cred which is important for some people. It was a fun certification because for me it was a deep dive into the Enneagram and I learned so much. Still on that learning path but this certification has given me a wonderful head start.

Check out this week’s blog where we continue our Spiral of Discovery and step into Arrows.

Transformed People Transform People: With your awareness, comes their awareness

Photo by SOULSANA on Unsplash

Once, a while ago, on a walk with a friend, I lamented how slow my coaching practice was taking off. “I want to make a difference,” I told her, “I want to impact lives but not tomorrow - I want it done YESTERDAY!” She listened and said, “Jules, you’ve impacted my life and in turn, I have impacted my husband, children, family, and friends - your work has a ripple effect. You are changing the world.” She is so sweet and I’m not sure how true that is, but I thought about this recently as I noticed a shift happening with the participants in my workshops this week.

During Week 1 of my Deep Dive workshop, the participants showed up saying “I never realized I did that” or “I noticed this week how I reacted when _____ happened,” or “When so-and-so does _____, I do _____.” There were other a-ha moments and they all embody what Richard Rohr writes in The Naked Now - We don’t see things how they are, we see things how we are. Seeing ourselves for the first time helps us uncover this truth and then we begin to see others in a completely different light. We realize we’ve been seeing them the way we are. Acknowledging this gives us a different perspective, our reactions shift and those of others in our lives will shift. Transformed people transform people (another steal from Richard Rohr).

While you may have opted out of my workshops, I do have a DIY-ish option. In upcoming blogs, I will take you on a journey - The Spiral of Discovery - where you will learn the Enneagram topics I am covering in the Deep Dive. I hope they get you thinking about yourself. My goal is to help you shift a little so your life shifts (for the better) and those in your life do too. You can read this week’s blog here.


Last Call for Deep Dive Workshop - 2 spots remain, begins 3/14

There is so much to learn about yourself and your loved ones through the Enneagram. I guarantee more fulfilling relationships and a more purposeful life when you join me on this journey of self-discovery. I only have two spots left on my Deep Dive and since I am offering a 2-for-1 on my Deep Dive Enneagram Workshop with a new start date of March 14th you’ll want to jump in! Email me and I can help you with the 2-for-1 deal.

Remember, I offer FREE Enneagram typing. If you want to join the workshop with a friend, they will want to be typed ASAP.

That is all I got this week - still playing catch-up from vacation!

Click Type 9’s Path to Wholeness drawing below for this week’s blog.

Observe. Reflect. Develop. The Personal Growth Journey breakdown

As a life coach, I often tell people that the beginning of change begins with awareness. Until recently, I never really thought about what comes after. With this three step process, Observe - Reflect - Develop, anyone can change their ways and set themselves up for a Future Self in more alignment with purpose.

All change starts with Observation. Nothing has brought this more to light than my personal work with the Enneagram. As a Type Five I have become (painfully) aware of my constant thinking, sprinkle in some fear, some avarice, my need to know and you’ve got a recipe for LOTS of observation. I find myself often pulling back from my typical reactions and just noticing them (especially those thoughts!). Without the Enneagram, it would have taken me so much longer to discover all of the things that make me me and everything I hadn’t noticed before in 58 years. Crazy, huh?

After Observe comes Reflect. Fives are probably pretty good at this since we tend to spend lots of time in our heads. That being said, Reflection lends itself to the why behind the actions. Super important work because if you don’t see the why then the how (Develop) is not possible. Let me explain.

My Center of Intelligence is Head. Knowing that I’m always thinking as a reaction (instead of being in my body or heart) gives me pause to consider another reaction. Recently on vacation, I wanted to wake up and spend some time working on a few things for my coaching work (I know, I’m on vacation, but I actually LOVE doing this kind of thing in some quiet space). Husband had a different plan - “Let’s take a walk to the coffee shop.” Even though I really wanted to be in my head, contemplating my next coaching idea, I had to stop thinking, get in touch with what he wanted (heart and body - he loves walking with me for my latte), and realize ‘I’m on vacation with my husband!’ So we did and of course, it was great. Develop. I know it sounds little, but my initial reaction isn’t about connection. It’s about preserving my resources and doing head-centered things. I kind of knew this about myself but not to the level I know myself now - thanks to the Enneagram. Now, I am rethinking my reactions and getting curious about how to Develop my heart and body centers.

Personal growth takes observation, reflection, and development. The Enneagram fast-tracks all three with the road map provided for transformational growth.

Remember, I offer FREE Enneagram typing, and now is the perfect time to book that since I am offering a 2-for-1 deal on my Deep Dive Enneagram Workshop with a new start date of March 14th. Email me and I can help you with the 2-for-1 deal.

Click Type 8’s Path to Wholeness drawing below for this week’s blog.

With Five Children comes Five Types

Photo by Anne Nygård on Unsplash

No one can predict why people become the Enneagram type they become. We do our best as parents, and our best is usually good enough, but the rest that isn’t good enough is where our human being-ness steps in and gives our children experiences they carry with them for a lifetime. Having Five children, sure there is some predisposition to a certain personality, but we also gave them messages that shaped them.

Our Childhood Message is a part of the Enneagram I use to help type people. It isn’t a time to think back and point fingers at our parents, after all I believe most parents do the best they have with what they’ve got, myself included of course (or at least I want to believe this). Whatever side of that debate you are on, we ALL receive childhood messages because we were children and we had perceptions as children we carry with us through our lifetimes. These perceptions affect many of our responses and decisions we make because we hold this perspective as truth - no matter how immature or untrue it is. In the case of our five children, all raised in the same house, same (ish) rules - five different types.

Here is a rundown of the Childhood Messages. Which one resonates with you?

Type One: It’s not ok to make mistakes

Type Two: It’s not ok to have your own needs

Type Three: It’s not ok to have my own feelings and identity

Type Four: It’s not ok to be too functional or happy

Type Five: It’s not ok to be too comfortable in the world

Type Six: It is not ok to trust myself

Type Seven: It’s not ok to depend on anyone or anything

Type Eight: It’s not ok to be vulnerable or trust anyone

Type Nine: It’s not ok to assert myself

I hope this has intrigued you. I know when typing people, the Childhood Message really blows their minds and then their behavior patterns start to make more sense.

Remember, I offer FREE Enneagram typing, and now is the perfect time to book that since I am offering a 2-for-1 deal on my Deep Dive Enneagram Workshop which starts on March 7th. Email me and I can help you with the 2-for-1 deal.

This Week’s Blog

West Point and Perspective

Brock receiving his nominations from Senator Welch and Congresswoman Ballint. Bernie was sick that day.

Our son, Brock has a big decision to make. He has been offered an appointment to West Point and now must decide if he wants to accept it. The service academy admission process is arduous. Eye exams, physical exams, many letters of recommendation, fitness tests, Senatorial and/or Congressional nominations, etc. Do you know what else is arduous? This Type Five’s struggle with not knowing and my Type Nine son’s perfect contentment to live in the “not-knowing. ” Since Nines struggle with actually knowing what they want they are at ease with a lack of decision-making. So teeth grinding, sleepless nights and Hyper-Rational thinking continue to challenge me as my mantras of “May I let go. May I be here now” continue to play in my mind.

This is a perfect example of how important it is to know your type and the types of the people in your life. Having this perspective on Brock’s personality is a constant reminder to give him the space and do my best to let this process unfold, in Nine time - which is ROUGH! Without this knowledge though, I would be pushing him to make a choice that I need to know causing him more stress than he already is feeling as he makes what could be the biggest decision of his life. He seems perfectly content to sit in the mystery. Once again, my Buddha Brock, teaches me his go-with-the-flow ways despite my Type’s resistance to it. Thank you, honey. Thank you.

Deep Dive Workshop begins March 7th!

In March, I am planning a Deep Dive into the Enneagram Workshop to meet on Thursday nights for six weeks.

I am limiting this to 6 people. We will cover:

  • Centers of Intelligence                                                      

  • Arrows and Wings             

  • Passion (Shadow)

  • Fixation

  • Saboteurs (including those of wings and arrows)                                                                                                

  • Basic Fear

  • Subtypes:  Self-Pres, Social and Sexual     

  • Triads:  Harmonic, Hornevian, Relational                               

  • Desire

  • Virtue       

  • Childhood message/Underlying Childhood message        

  • Core longing                                                                          

  • Levels of Development    

  • True Self Identity (Greatest Strength)

    Hence the term “Deep Dive”! There is a lot to learn with the Enneagram and certainly, you can do it yourself, but a Deep Dive with a group of like-minded learners and not-so-like-minded Types will help you become more self-observant, reflective, and pivot to self-development all while learning even more about others. This investment in yourself is $400 or 8 payments of $50. Here is the link to this workshop but be sure you have been typed with my Free Enneagram Typing Session or it will not make any sense to you.   

               

What Ninja and Ivy are teaching me.

I have two cats. They are siblings. One is a black cat (the one pictured) named Ninja and the other, a calico, named Ivy. The other morning, I glanced over from my Peloton and noticed how Ninja was waiting for his next meal. I got lazy a few months back and purchased an automatic feeder. He waits in his Docker’s box at the edge of the dining room table and stares at the automatic feeder. I’m fairly confident he doesn’t tell time because if he did, he would realize he has a minimum of two hours before his next meal. Ivy, on the other hand, goes about her business which only involves some form of sleeping (on a bunk bed, on my side of the bed, in my husband’s clothes he has left on the bed). She couldn't care less when the next meal was going to happen. Ninja is future-oriented. Ivy is present-oriented. I’m not confident an animal can be past-oriented, but I definitely am. This only came from giving some thought to my thoughts. All humans fall into these three categories with past, present, or future orientations. I didn’t know a cat could be future-oriented. I thought all animals were just deeply present. That is why it is so comforting to spend time with them. They are here, now. However, Ninja taught me something I should have known all along - he lives to eat no matter when that might be. That might be why he isn’t the most snuggly of types. He doesn’t want to waste time being with me, he’d rather be contemplating and preparing for when the food drops into his bowl. He is mission-oriented no matter the time of day. If he had an Enneagram type it would be either a 3, 7, or 8! They are doers, planners, and wondering “what’s next?”.

In the Enneagram world, there are three types of stances (Hornevian stances) which are the ways we approach life and get what we need: Compliant (Types 1, 2, and 6) Assertive (Types 3, 7, and 8), and Withdrawn (4, 5 and 9). Ivy is compliant - she lives in the present and is much more affectionate than Ninja. Ninja is assertive - he lives in the future and is mission-oriented (“When is the next time I eat?”), and I am withdrawn - where I focus on the past (observing the world and trying to figure things out). Knowing this about yourself doesn’t excuse you from these types of behaviors (I’m pretty sure, I can’t convince Ninja to change his ways), rather this knowledge opens our minds to other possibilities. You see, many of us are going through life without giving much thought to the why behind our actions. Understanding your Enneagram type will shed some light on this (among many other things) including your Hornevian Stance.

If you have already been typed and would like to meet again for a 15-minute follow-up to clarify your typing (I’m getting better at this!) OR you would like to schedule a FREE typing session, I would love to see you! Schedule those opportunities now: 15-minute follow-up or FREE Enneagram typing.

You live, you learn.

I keep learning, but that is who I am. I was confused why more people didn’t take me up on workshops, coaching, or even DIY options and then I realized, I left them overwhelmed. At the end of my typing sessions, I could feel the overload but I kept giving more information following up with an email loaded with even more.

So now, after some coaching for myself, I’m offering anyone who typed in 2023, to take me up on a 15-minute follow-up appointment so we can go over their type, confirm it is legit, and offer up some next steps. If you thought, “that was kind of cool but it didn’t resonate” then this 15 minute session is for you. I want to get this right! My mission is to help people in their growth journey and if were left feeling empty, I want to fix that. Yes, I’m talking to YOU! Anyone interested in booking this free session can do this here: https://app.paperbell.com/checkout/packages/76536

This week’s blog is all about the Two’s Path to Wholeness. If you are a Two or even think you know one, this is fantastic information for you to understand what makes them tick. After all, compassion and perspective are how we relate to one another, and understanding the Twos in your life is a relationship changer.

Back to Social Media and .....

it is rough! I struggle with providing information and making it fun to look at. Follow me on this journey if you are so inclined ( here is my Instagram handle) as I try to incorporate my love (and lack of skill) for watercolors into my Enneagram teachings. So during the week, especially for the next several, I will take you on each of the Enneagram type’s Path to Wholeness Journey - very simplified. This past week was Type One. I share the journey in my blog which is a summary of my Instagram posts (plus some more details).

Also, remember, I am offering Accountability Coaching. If those New Year’s Resolutions are starting to slip, this is a great way to get back on track and stay on track. You can check out that offering here.


Finally, if you haven’t been typed, you are missing out! Check out my FREE Enneagram Typing Session. Even if you can’t continue coaching with me, I would love to help you get typed. It is such a powerful personal growth tool, one you need to be ready for. But if you are ready, your life will never be the same and you will shortcut your spiritual path with an understanding about the Universe unlike never before. While I have plenty of continued coaching options, there is lots of Enneagram information out there for you DIYers. Happy to help you on your journey so please take me up on this. If you can’t or don’t want to (or better yet, already have), please forward this offer to anyone who might be interested. I really do love helping people find their type.

Last call for the deeply discounted Sage Journey!

PQ Intelligence™

The Sage Journey is a seven-week course designed to teach you how to tap into your Sage response. It is a beautiful investment in yourself and I’m offering this at a very deep discount.

What is this program exactly?

  • 7 weeks of self-care (where you will identify your sabotaging voices)

  • 3 of these weeks include Sage work (that positive voice where our most beautiful intentions come from)

  • Powered by PQ Intelligence app

  • Weekly weekend hour-long homework

  • Begins 10/31, 7:00 - 8:00 pm on Tuesdays

  • Special coupon: use the coupon SPECIALPRICING (gets you deeply discounted pricing off the regular price shown on my website)

  • Sign up with a friend and save even more!*

*Email me and let me know who you are signing up with so I can get you both in the system. 50% off is because you are sharing the cost or referring a friend. Either way - cheap cheap cheap!

The Sage Journey for Half the price, Group Coaching and FREE Typing Sessions!

PQ Intelligence™

Did someone say Self-Care for the Holidays? Did someone say 50% off? Yes, 50% off.

Now is the perfect time to carve out a self-care regimen in preparation for whatever is coming your way this holiday season. Do this with a friend and you both only pay for one!

What is this program exactly?

  • 7 weeks of self-care (where you will identify your sabotaging voices)

  • 3 of these weeks include Sage work (that positive voice where our most beautiful intentions come from)

  • Powered by PQ Intelligence app

  • Weekly weekend hour-long homework

  • Begins 10/31, 7:00 - 8:00 pm on Tuesdays

  • Special coupon: SPECIALPRICING (gets you deeply discounted pricing of regular price shown)

  • Sign up with a friend and share the cost!*

*Email me and let me know who you are signing up with so I can get you both in the system. 50% off is because you are sharing the cost or referring a friend. Either way - cheap cheap cheap!






Have you already been Enneagram typed?

Now it is time to get working on yourself

Join me beginning October 26th at 7:00 pm for my first Enneagram Group Coaching session where we tackle the Centers of Intelligence. This is a critical first step in balancing out these centers (aka mind, body, and spirit). This investment in your Enneagram Journey is only $35.



AN ENNEAGRAM TYPING SESSION WITH ME IS FREE!

The Enneagram provides a system for you to see the characteristics and qualities you have historically identified with and how you have coped with life. Based on your particular Enneagram orientation, you’ll gain insight into how you make decisions, handle stress, and interact with others. Much more than a personality test, the Enneagram provides the structure for the deep personal growth work we are meant to do while on this planet. No other system compares. If you have a friend who you think might enjoy this, please forward this newsletter to them.

Seven weeks of Self-Care (Holiday Prep!), Hyper-Rational Reflection and New Enneagram Group Coaching Offer

Seven weeks of

Self-Care

(Holiday Prep!)

Did someone say Self-Care for the Holidays? Now is the perfect time to carve out a self-care regimen in preparation for whatever is coming your way this holiday season.

This seven-week self-care program will help you identify the sabotaging voices in your head (your Saboteurs) and how you can change them into your Sage voice.  The ultimate in self-care, this program is an empowering journey, focusing most importantly on your self-talk and how this affects every part of your life.   Powered by the PQ Intelligence™ app and weekly group coaching sessions, your life will forever be changed for the positive!

We will meet for 7 weeks on Tuesday nights beginning 10/31 from 7:00 - 8:00 pm. Click here for more details and to sign up!

PQ Intelligence™

If you didn’t know a Hyper-Rational, you do now. Because this is my Saboteur (PQ Intelligence™). Remember, these Saboteurs are directly linked to a Type on the Enneagram and this one belongs to Type Five. Fives are capable of deep insight and understanding through analysis, have the ability to concentrate, dive in towards expertise and knowledge and have explorer and inventor tendencies. Fives are very private people (that is why I come across as stand-off-ish), show feelings through passion and ideas and prefer to observe and analyze from a distance.

The Hyper-Rational thoughts include “The rational mind is most important,” “Feelings are distracting and irrelevant,” “I need to shut out intrusions.” The lie this Saboteur tells you (me) is that that rational mind is the most important, feelings and needs are a wasteful intrusion, and emotions mess things up. These lies limit depth and flexibility in relationships and can intimidate less analytically thinking people.

I’m certainly not proud of my Saboteur, but I can see it clearly now and how it impacts my day to day interactions. I consciously make an effort to bring my Sage strengths to the present whenever I notice my Saboteur is getting in the way. For many people, we can go a lifetime without recognizing these negative behaviors as we have been wired to have them be our go-to reaction, no matter your dominant Saboteur.

I always say in coaching, “Awareness is the first step.” That is why it is so important to be typed properly. If you simply go off of a test you’ve taken or just listened to a podcast, you won’t be fully sure until you bounce thoughts and situations off of another person. I hope you take me up on the FREE Enneagram Session offer. It has been so fun discovering people’s types. My Investigative ways just thrive in these sessions. Book that here!

You’ve already been typed?

Then it is time to dive in. Join me beginning October 26th at 7:00 pm for my first Enneagram Group Coaching session where we tackle the Centers of Intelligence. This is a critical first step in balancing out these centers (aka mind, body, and spirit). You can join me here

This week’s blog is a reflection on my first 10 FREE sessions and what I have learned - to your BENEFIT

Saboteur "Victim" Reflection, Group Enneagram Coaching begins 10/26

Positive Intelligence™

Ah, the Victim. We all know one, we may even be one! According to Positive Intelligence™, we do have nine saboteurs, not all at once but throughout our lives. I’m not fully buying that idea, but I certainly buy into having at least one Saboteur (not including our Judge - which we all have).

I’m sure you can all recognize the Victims in your life, whether it is your go-to Saboteur, or a close friend or family member. The characteristics include being withdrawn and pouty, fairly dramatic and temperamental, when things get tough, they give up and they seek attention through having emotional pain.

The Victim’s thoughts include “No one understands me,” “I am uniquely flawed,” and “Poor me, terrible things happen to me all the time.” Victims feel alone, and melancholy and usually have negative comparisons and envy.

They justify their Victim behavior by telling the lies that this is the way they will get attention and that sadness is noble. Their childhood message included not feeling seen or accepted, that something especially was wrong with them.

But the Victim Saboteur has the positive sides of the Type 4 on the Enneagram. Their strengths include being sensitive, introspective, very perceptive of the nuanced inner workings of the mind, and very capable of using this strength to connect, teach, inspire, and heal others.

Like all Saboteurs, this is just the beginning of self-actualization. If the Victim is your go-to strategy when things are going South, then you may be an Enneagram Type 4. Self-reflection is the beginning of typing yourself on the Enneagram.

Not sure if you can do it alone? Book a free session and I will give you access to two assessments to help us figure out your type. Together we can nail down your type and then the fun begins!

I’VE BEEN TYPED NOW WHAT?

I get this question after most every Enneagram typing session. Sure, I follow up with an email with some general information but the real work is in learning more about who you are, your strengths, shadow, childhood message, Triad, Arrows, Wings and more. Where does an Enneagram type begin?

Well, the least expensive way is a DIY. Read what you can get your hands on, and listen to books, or podcasts. But the truth of the matter is, you need feedback. So many times in my typing sessions, listening to the client, I am able to reflect back to them something they did not realize they said. Or another group participant says something slightly differently and it deeply resonates with the client.

Beginning Thursday night, 10/26 at 7:00 pm, I will be offering a twice monthly Enneagram Group Coaching session where we will start tackling the nuances of the Enneagram beginning with the Triads, starting with The Centers of Intelligence: Head, Heart and Body. The Centers of Intelligence help identify our most accessible emotional response or reaction; for those with a Head Center, anxiety and distress, for those with the Heart Center, fear and shame, and for those coming from the Body Center, frustration or anger. We will dive into exactly what this all means for YOU that night. This is the beginning of learning more about yourself and a perfect opportunity to take your personal growth journey one step further. $35. Sign up today. Limited to 8 people.

Saboteur Hyper-Achiever Reflection and Enneagram Upcoming Weekly Workshop

Positive Intelligence™

Ah, the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur. This character belongs predominantly to Enneagram Type 3, the Achiever. This type has many beautiful strengths - driven, pragmatic, adaptable, goal-oriented and self-directed. The Type 3 is also capable of growing self and others. When the Sage is present, Type 3s are inspiring and help others with meaningful growth. But when Hyper-Achiever shows up, things change.

According to PQ Intelligence™, Hyper-Achiever is dependent on constant performance and achievement for self-respect and validation. When this Saboteur is at play, one is focused on external validation, attention and acceptance by others. If this is your main Saboteur, you can suffer from workaholism and lose touch with emotional needs. The Hyper-Achiever is competitive and image-conscious. It tends to cover up insecurities and use chameleon tactics to impress others. This keeps people at a safe distance.

Thoughts of the Hyper-Achiever include “I must be the best at what I do,” “emotions get in the way of performance,” “my worthiness is based on my success.” This Saboteur believes it is important to feel successful and fears intimacy and vulnerability as others would find out about the Hyper-Achiever’s imperfections. The lies this Saboteur tells us is that life is about achieving, a good image equates in results, and that feelings are a distraction. The childhood message may have been that love is conditional and I am loved for my achievements. Parents may have been absent.

If this describes most of your negative thoughts, you may be a Type 3. There are many strategies to overcome these thoughts and actions but it is important to start with the self-command of recognizing when your behaviors are trending towards this Saboteur which the Mental Fitness workshop beginning 10/12 will help with considerably. If you aren’t sure this is your main Saboteur, it is always a good idea to get typed. I am (and will continue to) offering a FREE Enneagram Sessions. You just need to take a couple of assessments and together we will uncover your Enneagram type. Then the real growth begins. Don’t put your head in the sand. Book your FREE appointment today.

WEEKLY ENNEAGRAM GROUP COACHING

Keep your eyes out for my weekly Enneagram Group Sessions coming soon. Once you are typed, you can jump into these workshops and take a deeper dive in a group setting to learn more about what is making you tick. I will be working out the details soon but in the meantime, get typed so you can take advantage of this affordable group coaching option.

Enneagram: Woo-woo or Legit?

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